Alien: Covenant - Barry Neeson Reviews

You know how if you ever go to McDonalds you look at the pictures of the burgers and they look great. The buns look well formed, the salad looks crisp and the burger looks juicy and its all stacked together perfectly. Then you order it and lets face it we already know it's not going to look like the picture on the menu but there is that briefest of brief moments just before you crack open the box that you think “This will be the one. This will be the burger that looks like the picture on the menu.” and you open it......

...and its not.

But you paid three pounds for it and that's not so bad and you knew what you where getting into because, well, it's McDonalds.

Would you still feel that way if the burger cost you £11.40?


You would be pissed off.

And that's how I feel about Alien: Covenant.

So AC is a sequel to Prometheus and a kinda prequel to Alien and that's where the problems start for me, it looks to shiny to be a prequel to Alien, the tech looks too futuristic. Now I understand the original Alien is 28 years old and movie production has advanced quite a bit but its just a nit pic on my part.

The movie its self starts off strong with something happening in the opening scene that I really didn't see coming which lulled me into a false sense of security but by two thirds of the way in I really couldn't be bothered. LikePrometheus before it it looked great in places and that to me was its second fault, it's hard to be scared of a singular alien when you don't have that sense of claustrophobia.

Also like Prometheus, you don't really feel anything for the characters other than “Really? You are going to do that? Anyone with half a brain would not stick there face in th.....oh wait, you did.”

One thing I will give AC is that its quite gory in places but not enough to save it.

It's hard to properly get into what I disliked about this film with out spoilers but lets just say one of the biggest plot twists was part of their advertising campaign that even if you were actively avoiding spoiler trailers the title of the youtube thumbnail would have given it away anyway and the rest you can see coming a mile away and the way it wraps up just left me feeling like it was crapping over the moviesthat came before....but would come after in the time line...... fuck! its star wars episodes 1-3 all over again.

I already know that Alien:Covenant is dividing opinions but for me this was one to watch on DVD.

Alien:Covenant is in cinemas now