Hate is a very strong word, a nasty word, and quite often people shy away from admitting that they hate anything as there's no real coming back from using it.
It is a word that is out there on its own.
It's the closing of a door on a subject, the line drawn in the sand that cannot be crossed, and while it can be justified at times, it is more often than not irrational.
And that's where what follows exists.
Our list of most hated bands, and solo artists, is a ship adrift in a sea of irrationality, and yet when it was broached as an article idea we embraced it full well knowing that liking and loathing bands is a subjective matter, and no matter who got the brown and sticky end of the stick others would disagree, and of course that is their right.
One mans meat is another mans poison after all.
So anyway, here it is, the 'New Hellfire Club's members list of cut my ears off please' acts.
Oh, and it shouldn't need to be said, but the loathing expressed for the output does not equate to any hatred for the artist(s) because we are not psychopaths, but there we just said it for clarification purposes anyway.
Mainy - It's Kula Shaker for me.
They make the roots of my hair hurt.
I honestly can't say why, but I just have to hear an intro to one of their Hindu flavoured indie pop rock tracks and my stomach actually lurches.
It's the sound of the middle east shoved into a blender and pureed to within an inch of its life.
The sort of thing a western ad company would commission for a campaign to sell microwaved curries to students.
They seem to be a band that offends my lizard brain.
The second time around hit Tattva elicits a fight of flight response with the latter being the preferred option as lashing out at strangers just because someone mistyped the number for another track into a pub jukebox is not the done thing.
Remember the rock by numbers 'Hey Dude'?
On the surface it initially sounded like it was doing the business, but by the second time around it lost all appeal.
Everything about it just seemed to scream 'made in a laboratory'.
It would be the result of homework assignment from the school of rock.
A box ticking exercise with faux passion added to ensure a course credit is awarded.
It's empty vacuous nonsense once you actually listen to it.
In my opinion.
And don't get me started on 'Hush'.
Hush man, just please, please no more.
Okay the Hammond organ is a saving grace, but even that fails to really save it.
It's like an inflatable life ring with a puncture.
It tries to do the job, but just can't.
The Hammond is the little life ring that can't.
Deep Purple may have enjoyed the royalties, but probably grudgingly.
When the song was out I had dreams of Ritchie Blackmore hunting Crispin Mills down and kicking the shit out of him.
I had an ex that used to love the album and played it on rotation.
In hindsight maybe she hated me and this was some perverse psychological torture.
In the end I had to point out that I was working full time, doing overtime shifts, and even overnight shifts, and that meant that she had hours and hours to devote to listening to it when I wasn't there, and could she please, for the love of god, just try not to put it on when I was at home.
Her reluctance to do this should have been a sign that the relationship was doomed, or that she needed a hearing test.
I'm still not sure what to take from that.
So in conclusion if at some point in my life there are some shady looking people trying to get some information out of me can I just ask that they skip the nail removal and car battery crocodile clips to the nether regions combo and just go straight to Kula Shaker and I will tell them whatever they need to know.
Campbell - Def Leppard for me. I'll qualify that more. Everything Def Leppard did from Pyromania onwards is dire, but the first two albums are bonafide rock classics. For a band that were so heavily associated with the burgeoning New Wave Of British Heavy Metal scene that projected them towards stardom, they didn't half do a runner away from that genre. The signs were there early on, with Hello America from the debut album hinting at where they saw their future. And sure enough, after the brilliant High 'n' Dry, meticulously produced by Mutt Lange, they upped sticks to the States and spent an eternity working on album number 3, again with Lange at the helm. I've never forgiven him for that one.
They needn't have bothered. A once raw and exciting rock band had been reduced to little more than insipid sickly sweet pop hitmakers with guitars. I hated the album with a passion, and still do, and as far as I'm concerned, they have never redeemed themselves. Pretty much everything released since is just as bad, if not worse. It took 35 years for me to go see them live again, mainly because Whitesnake were touring with them. I left after 30 minutes. It was awful. I wasn't alone, the Glasgow rock pubs were soon filling up with Whitesnake fans who had walked out early too. I only have one thing to ask the Lepps.... I suppose some rock's out of the question?
Martin - Dire straits and hipsway.
Brothers in arms and money for nothing were on a constant loop in Glasgow pubs, mostly due to video jukebox's. Every 10 minutes it seemed - and at 18 dire straits were very much for the oldies in my mind. To this day I can't listen to them, sickened by over exposure.
So, to escape the mainstream music I started going to student unions. It's here I learned to hate hipsway.
The music was OK - the white boy soul thing is passable if done well (let's not go there Wet Wet Wet) but once again the constant loop just killed it for me.
To this day I have a nervous tick whenever broken years or the honey thief come into ear shot.
'Are you broke are you broke' - aye, I'm fuckin bust hipsway, go fuck yourself !!!!
Honourable mention - eurythmics, thorn in my side. A great band but by god I hate that song. See dire straits - video jukebox and mtv have a lot to answer for.
Jamie - The only time I ever... EVER left a gig halfway through the headline band, and propped myself up at a bar, alone and in a
stinker of a mood, was at a Mogwai gig in Glasgow. It was in the ABC, and the year isn't really important. In fact, I don't
even really remember when it was, as my brain tends to file shit I disliked in the 'shit I disliked' file and then burns it, maddeningly, to ashes. That way it never darkens my memory banks by accident again, unless someone asks me, innocently enough, 'what band do you really hate?' Then I need to go digging through those charred embers of mistakes best forgotten to find them, to find the memories of that one, shitty gig.
Why do I hate Mogwai so much? You ask in despair (as many other have done in the past, they seem to be rather well liked among my friends and family in particular). Well, the answer to that is simple.
They just fucking bore me.
Like, bored to actual salty, gonna choose a building and jump from it just to stop that fucking music, tears.
It just all seems like vacuous, jumped up, wanky, insufferable bullshit.
So is it controversial, do you think, not to like Mogwai? Probably. Let's face it, they are an awful beige band to fully get your hate on for, but we all have to hate something, if it wasn't them, it would be something else, so why not it be them I say.
Then again, I always hated the colour beige too.
But that's all they are to me.
Vacuous, jumped up, wanky, insufferable Beige...
...and that, my friends, is about the harshest thing I can say about a band.
Chrissy - Over the years my music taste has evolved drastically; liking bands I used to dislike and vice versa as well as discovering hundreds (if not thousands!) of new music, styles and artists. The one constant for me from the get-go is my aversion to Pink Floyd. It took me a while to decide on Floyd for this article due to the use of the word “hate.”
Do I hate Pink Floyd? Do I hate the band specifically or the music? What even are feelings anymore?
When it comes to giving certain music another chance with fresh ears and experience then I’m all for it but I’ve never tried as hard to acquire a taste as I have with Pink Floyd and my review has remained unchanged – they bore me. Yes, I can appreciate the actual musical talent and can see why they have been so popular but the majority of their songs do absolutely nothing for me except provoke a sigh and maybe a little “here we go again.”
My feelings toward Pink Floyd have grown to hate probably in a larger part to the fans rather than the lyrics, sound or personalities of the band members. Whenever it gets brought up the conversation generally goes the same way. I get asked “how can you not like Pink Foyd?” (Usually always how, not why) and I have to give a review/dissertation on each album and key points on my distaste. I’ve never had to go into as much detail with any other artist as to why I don’t like them.
The conversation doesn’t end just like that though. What follows is usually a claim that I either have an inferior music taste or I’m doing it wrong. Wait… What!?
Yep, usually what follows is asking if I’d tried listening to it in various settings, under the influence of various substances or at certain times and less polite types usually add a bit more colour:
“Have you tried it while really high?”
“What about with headphones in on your own?”
“Ugh… You just don’t get it! What do you listen to that’s better?”
Fuck off! I’m sorry but if I have to take 8 different substances at 2am under the influence of a full moon on the summer solstice whilst holding a Crane pose for the duration before I can enjoy some music then just no. An album or artist shouldn’t need an instruction manual. Sure there is a definite connection between certain music and specific drugs or emotions but adding in too many extra steps defeats the purpose of how universally accessible music is supposed to be and different tastes should be discussed with interest rather than used to make you feel like you’re somewhat broken.
Maybe I don’t get it. But I’ve heard nearly everything you have to say on the matter over the years and now I’ve been driven to the point that it’s not the music I hate so much as the whole idea of Pink Floyd. But, as ever I’ll stumble on and be fine until the next time I’m having a smoke at a house party and “just HAVE to” listen to Comfortably Numb… if only I was…