Dear Misfits, or Jerry, as who gives a fuck about the rest of them eh?
You’re the Misfits man. We know it, you know it. So let’s get down to brass tacks here.
I’ve just been listening to the new album from The Cadaver Club and it has to be said that it’s really just a polite request from them to you to loosen your grip on the horror punk crown.
They are being nice about it, but I don’t have to be.
So about this crown, you’ve had it a while and it’s probably getting a bit too heavy for you to carry around.
So on you go, just relinquish it.
You will feel better for it.
It hasn’t fitted since Glen left you anyway, and his return doesn’t mean that you can slip it back on and it will fit now.
Trying to squeeze it onto your head is like a forty year old attempting to wear a pair of denims that were already a bit tight when he was sixteen.
It’s just not happening.
It’s like your Devil Lock in many ways.
Yeah I know no one wants to mention it, but you are combing it over from the back of your neck now.
The crown used to look good on you, but now, like the Devil Lock, it just looks…..well look in the mirror Jerry, look in the mirror.
Yeah okay. ‘It’s always the quiet ones’ is pop punk in nature, but c’mon man, you did the Monster Mash.
Do we have to mention Project 1950?
Name a song since from Project 1950 onwards and anything the Cadaver Club has done would shit all over it.
In fact just pick any song at random from their new album and it would do it all on its lonesome.
It wouldn’t even break a sweat Jerry.
With one hand tied behind its back and a blindfold on it could still beat anything you guys have laid down in years.
The Cadaver Club track would be like an able bodied guy coming out victorious in a fight against a one legged man in an arse kicking competition.
Hey, I’m a Misfits fan.
Bought the albums, went to the gigs.
I’ve waved the flag for you.
It’s just that we are all getting older now and there are young bands needing the space you are talking up, and if anyone deserves to fill the vacuum that you could leave then it is these guys.
They really do have it all.
If Green Day were sprung from the warped imaginations of the Hammer House of Horror team then they would have sounded like The Cadaver Club.
That’s them in a nutshell.
In one fell swoop The Cadaver Club have just shown with ‘It’s always the quiet ones’ that punk can be fun, that it can be rock and roll again, and yes, it can be pop in nature too.
They have released a party album that makes Halloween a year round event.
Less of a trick and more definitely a treat every single time you hit play and let the band do their thing.
Do the right thing Jerry. Do the right thing.
Yours sincerely, The New Hellfire Club.